A funny thing happened on the way to . . . where? or what? Hard to describe what I’m trying to write about. You see, our oldest daughter, Heather, came down from Minneapolis two weeks ago to spend a weekend with her Beloved Mother (okay, my description, not necessarily hers). In the course of our reminiscing about her and her siblings growing-up years, she recalled with a chuckle how her dad’s arms would itch whenever we would tease him. He’d try to hide it but finally as the chorus of, “Look – I’ll bet Dad’s arms are starting to itch,” grew, he inevitably would scratch his arms, all the while insisting they weren’t really itching.
I commented that Meg has the same reaction to being teased, which was a surprise to Heather. That got me thinking about all the other facets of Bing’s personality and/or appearance our five offspring have inherited.
The list is somewhat amazing – at least to me. If all of you find it less than amazing, or even boring, please don’t tell me – just humor me. I promise in my next column I’ll try to deal with something more earthshaking. (Caveat: I said I’ll try, emphasis on try, so don’t hold your collective breaths.)
Number one offspring, Heather, laughs like Bing. Sort of a throaty chuckle. She also rolls her eyes like he did whenever I come up with some theory they deem preposterous. (Caveat: my theories are never preposterous. Well, maybe a little. Sometimes.) She also inherited his intense loyalty to family. Example: When someone hurts one of her siblings, she instantly goes into, “Let me at ’em, I’ll beat ’em up” mode.
Number two offspring, Erin, has Bing’s nurturing temperament. Example: In kindergarten, Erin was so protective of her friend, Lisette, she would quickly complete whatever little project was assigned, then rush over to Lisette’s side and do her project for her. Their teacher, Mrs. Laird, suggested to Lisette’s mother and me that we have the girls assigned to separate rooms for first grade, which we did. Years later, Lisette said she was so lost without Erin next to her, she would often bolt from her room into Erin’s. She said Erin once shoved Jimmy Degen off his chair so Lisette could sit there beside her.
Number three offspring, Meg, as noted before, inherited Bing’s itchy-when-teased arms. She also has his sense of fair play and abhorrence of injustice of any kind. She also sings like him (not too well, but with enthusiasm when she thinks, like he did, that no one is listening.)
Number four offspring, Amy, has his sensitivity to others’ feelings, never wanting to hurt anyone. She also loves the same somewhat-gross television comedies and comedians that he loved – and I hate!
Finally, offspring number five, Wade. He loves the same music Bing did, as well as golf, the Chicago Bears, pizza and bread pudding (none of the rest of us can stand it, unless it’s doused in chocolate). Wade also has Bing’s eyes and grin – startlingly so.
Okay, we’ve reached the end of the list – aren’t you glad we didn’t have ten children?
Please, don’t answer that.